I’ve been longing for that moment to say goodbye. I think it has found me today.

A long weekend with my cousins, aunts and uncles put me in the correct frame of mind. I’ve felt paralyzed, but they seem to awaken me. They put things in perspective. Seeing them made me visualize a lovely future and that was the life raft I needed.

So, tonight I said goodbye. I said goodbye to an old dream. I am building a new dream. I cannot wait for it to unfold.


September 2014 Goals

Hard to believe that tomorrow is September! I cannot wait to start this month. So many things are going to happen. I am looking forward to doing so much. I think about how I want my life to be at the end of September. I want to be more centered and secure in my life. I want to connect to my friends and create a sage haven for myself. I also want to stay busy to keep my mind occupied.

  • Trip to Washington
  • Finish the Meltdown
  • Clean garage
  • Read 3 books
  • Blog weekly
  • Work out at least 350 minutes a week
  • Organize work documents
  • Find a fall race
  • Celebrate my sister’s birthday
  • Prep for a 25 minute 5k
  • Write all my thank you notes

Happy Cheating

Can you believe it is already August 4th? Where has this year gone?

I am two weeks into the meltdown. I had my first weigh in on Sunday. I only lost 1 pound and .6 of an inch on my stomach. I will be honest, I was depressed. 700 minutes of exercise and strict eating combos/time had me expecting so much more. Yesterday was a cheat day. I actually am lighter today after the cheat day. It is so interesting. It must have been the ridiculous amount of fruit I ate yesterday! And yes. That is cooked lamb liver below….mmmmm

IMG_0500 IMG_0501 IMG_0503 IMG_0504 IMG_0515 IMG_0516 IMG_0517 IMG_0519


The Meltdown

I haven’t talked of anything of note for a while. Since last August, I have checked out of life.

Yes. I graduated. I ran my first half marathon. I have nothing else really to show for the last year. Most of my days have been spent coming home and watching Netflix from my bed while doing tasks like working and eating. It is bad.

I don’t know how this really happened. I think I just gave up. My life has lacked meaning completely. It is really sad to say that my life has lacked meaning. I’m frustrated. I will not soak in shoulda woulda coulda. That is what got me here in the first place.

I have packed on the fat. I won’t say pounds. I have packed on the pounds, but when people find out that I weigh 160, they tend to not count it as a dire situation. I live in the Midwest. What can I say? People tolerate weight way more around here. Regardless, I don’t like the way I look and feel. I am not happy with my body.

Well, I wasn’t happy with my life. I decided to change things.

I tried to get the hell out of the Midwest. And I tried to coerce my boyfriend to marry me/broke up with him and cried for months. Neither of those two things really worked out for me. So, what did I do? I got back together with my boyfriend. He is a wonderful man that loves me. He makes me a better person. I have faith that we will grow together and the marriage thing will work its self out. Then after that, I bought a house in this little town. I have been renting my entire adult life. It was time to take control. So, I found a realtor and started the whole process. I close in August.

Then I decided to do the MELTDOWN.

Now, it seems like I have done nothing but had meltdowns. This is a little different. Next Generation is a gym in my town. I have called it the “cult gym” for years. Everyone that goes there is obsessed with it….Because it works. It works because of the meltdown program. It is 8 weeks long. 8 weeks of detailed eating and fitness WITH ACCOUNTABILITY. That is the element that made me decide that this is the change I need to make. I need that jump start.

Days before my 32nd birthday, I am starting the meltdown. For 8 weeks I will be on this plan. It is only 8 weeks. So much good can happen in 8 weeks. I cannot wait to start!

Itchy Scalp and Sagging Skin

Let me start this off by saying a few things.

  • I don’t wash my hair every day.
  • I use minimal products on my face.

The last few weeks, my scalp has been itching like the dickens. I haven’t even gone to bed with wet hair (that always seems to set my scalp on fire). I was just dealing with it until last week at work, I had to brush off my shoulders several times. When it gets to the point of dandruff, I have to do something.

I almost went to the drug store to get some Neutrogena Tgel, but I thought I would go natural this time. What did I do? I used eucalyptus oil and apricot oil straight on my scalp.

I put about a tablespoon of apricot oil with 8 drops of the eucalyptus oil and massaged it into my scalp. It is kind of itching right now as it is in a bun on top of my head soaking, but I am confident that this will make it so much better. Plus the smell is divine.

My skin has been lack luster lately. I am sure it is more my poor diet and lack of exercise than my skin care products. Still, I thought I would pamper it tonight. So, I have given myself a facial in the mean time.

Step 1: Use hot water on a wash cloth and rinse skin to open up pores.

Step 2:

I enjoy the Freeman AntiStress Mask. I think it is inexpensive and gentle on my skin. The scent is pleasant and the shade of turquoise doesn’t make me as terrified as the bright white or green for some reason.

Step 3:

I love Arbonne. This mist balancing toner is fantastic. So light and perfect to start the facial ritual.

Step 4:

I will have to say that Arbonne’s serum is so much better for my skin than Ellen Tracy’s. I feel that my skin gets a little to oily with Ellen Traicy intensive deep wrinkle serum. That being said, I have dry skin. Any amount of oil feels like too much. I have had a few zits since use. I get a pimple about once a month. So far, I have had four this month. I will see what my skin does when I start my workouts.

Step 5:

An older woman once told me that the secret to preventing wrinkles is tons of moisturizer. I bought this pot of balm about three months ago. I am almost done. I love the stuff. I slather it from chest to chin. It has a wonderful light smell that does not interfere with your lotion.

Step 6:

This is my witch doctor time. I do spot treatments of essential oil. I have a pimple. I will mix a little bit of face lotion and lavender and apply it to the area. Wrinkled spots get frankincense mixed with face lotion. I only use Doterra oils and my face lotions differ from Arbonne to Nuance to Lumene. It really depends on what my face has been doing and what I want for that day.

Step 7: Enjoy my supple skin and start on a mani/pedi!


What I Have Used

So, I have been watching a lot of video blogs. I love it. I love to see makeup techniques, morning rituals, healthy cooking, organization tips and workout plans. It has been inspiring me. My blog used to force me to try new things, but with some changes in work, I felt uninspired. Watching these channels on Youtube has forced me to look at my daily habits and examine them. Finding the little rituals in daily life and thinking more about what I do and what I use day in and day out has inspired me.

So, to get to the meat of my blog, I thought I would post a little bit about what products I have used and little bits about them.

Items A, B, and C All Eyeshadows

Items A, B, and C
All Eyeshadows


Items D, E, F, G


Items H and I



A and B – I worked at Victoria’s  Secret for two years in my early twenties. In that time, I learned so much about makeup application. I am by no means an expert, but I learned about highlighting, shadowing, liners, primers, etc. Every semi-annual sale, I like to stop by V.S. and pick up makeup. I found these two items two years ago. Royal and Most Wanted were two great palettes. Royal was a wonderful smoky purple and Most Wanted was the perfect natural trio for my skin and eyes. The only problem with trios is that I use the lighter color way before I use the darkest color as you can see. I would buy these again, but Victoria’s Secret has discontinued all of their makeup… I have learned that I should buy singles

C – This is a Mary Kay color I received from my Aunt about 6 years ago. Can’t believe it took me this long to finish it. Obviously, this color didn’t quite fit me.

D – Gillette Fusion is a men’s razor. I actually prefer it for my legs. I think I get a better shave without getting the razor burn.

E –  Neutrogena Wet Skin spray on spf 30 is a wonderful sunscreen. I have tired of the scent because I used it every day last year during my long vacation. It is gentle on my sensitive skin and doesn’t clog my pores.

F – Lumene is a skin care line you can get at your drug store. I find it very moisturizing and gentle. I prefer all natural products, but this is great for a drugstore brand. This was a small pot of night cream. It lasted a while and it cost less that $5. If you ever need product from the drugstore, I strongly recommend Lumene. It has a pleasant scent and a very nourishing quality.

G – My favorite product in this list. DoTerra Lavender oil is the best thing ever. It is such high grade that you can even ingest it. I use this oil for any type of burns including sunburns. It is great on bug bites and any small abrasion or skin irritation. DoTerra is a product I fully support. It is expensive, but it is worth every penny.

H – This is a MacBook Air case I bought from Amazon. It was better than going without a case, but it never fit quite right. The bottom portion broke and I just ordered a new one this week. I hope the pink is better than this strange coral.

I – I bought this great pine scented candle at TJMaxx this winter. Yankee’s Balsam and Cedar is the best candle I have bought of this type. I love the scent of any evergreen, but often candles can have that perfume quality. Would buy this again!


So these are the products I have just finished recently. Have you used any of these?


BackPacker June 2014

BackPacker is one of the many magazines I get. I kind of have a problem with how many I have at this time. The stack in my living room is growing by the day. So, I thought I would go through and do a review of a few of these magazines.

June 2014

June 2014


I was excited to get my hands on this edition. It has been two years since I have been out West. I miss it. I miss the smell of the evergreens. The air is clean and crisp. The pine needles coat the earth and when the sun shines through the trees it shines like the sand on the beach. I miss so much about the West. This magazine made me heartsick for it. Alas….

Nothing like relaxing with your hiking boots off at the end of the day.

Nothing like relaxing with your hiking boots off at the end of the day.

Had no idea this gem was so close.

Had no idea this gem was so close.

Disperse, crouch by shrubbery and cover your ears....

Disperse, crouch by shrubbery and cover your ears….

Hike Forever

Hike Forever


I have been from Acadia to Olympia and many parks in between. Sometimes, I am overwhelmed by the beauty that is our country. I find the moments spent in our National Parks some of the best moments on my life. What are the best hikes you have traversed?